a lot to think about. .

wow, what a week. shane is working shutdown all week (12 hour days). so brandi and i scrapbooked all day on tuesday and wednesday. i didn't get as much done as i wanted to. on tuesday i got more done, but tuesday evening i got a phone call that changed everything for me. buster called and wanted to make an appointment for shane and i to meet with the bishop "if shane can". so i immediately knew that the appointment was for me, and i knew it was something important. i was just in the bishop's office two weeks ago to renew my temple recommend. i told buster THAT, and he said that i am on "the list". i asked him what they were re-organizing, and he said that he didn't know, but that they had just given him some names of people to call. so shane and i went to the bishop's office at 8:15 p.m. and what he asked me totally caught me off guard. i thought i knew the organization i was in there for, but i was totally off on the specific calling. i'm not sure of myself. i was caught totally off guard. so now i have a lot to think about. tuesday night, i didn't sleep much at all. . maybe five hours. i don't do well on little sleep. my mind races around and around thinking, thinking, thinking. i really need to go to the temple. as soon as i make a decision that i can be sure of, i will feel sooo much better. my mind is so scattered right now. i took a tylenol pm last night and slept much better. i didn't really want to get up this morning. i think that all of this thinking is wearing me out. . it's exhausting. so brandi and i scrapbooked all day wednesday, too. i finished a two-page spread that i had started on tuesday, and got another single page done. that's it. almost nothing. pathetic. i think i was thinking and talking too much. it was nice to have brandi here though. she kept my mind going. . thinking about other things too. i adore her. we have so much fun together. she is a really good person. i think i can talk to her about anything. i wish we'd have found each other sooner. i think we were meant to be friends. seriously. she totally understands me.
shane is so good too. he keeps hugging me, trying to comfort me. he tries to make suggestions that might help me. he's so supportive. i know he loves me. i love him so much. we totally belong together. i know he can tell that i am stressed. he wants me to be comfortable and secure. he's the best! i am surrounded by so many good people - family and friends. i feel so blessed. the people around me help me define who i am, who i want to be. i'm so lucky!